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Pearl Rugless O'Meally and Mary Ludlow Bookout oral history, 2019.
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- speakerI love you but just want start
- speakertalking about what it was like to be
- speakeron my pastor nominating committee
- speakerthat called Janie.
- speakerOkay, let's start right at the beginning in Virginia's
- speakerapartment.
- speakerYes. And Virginia
- speakerwas very active
- speakerin the church. Yeah, and
- speakershe was
- speakersomeone
- speakerof interest that you could.
- speakerYou'll want to listen to.
- speakerSo when they appointed us, appointed
- speakerme for
- speakerthe nomination committee which was
- speakerone of the first I said "Oh my
- speakerGod!" I was so overwhelmed
- speakerand doing so, then we
- speakergathered to the apartment.
- speakerAnd we met each other and that's
- speakerwhere I met Mary.
- speakerAnd from there
- speakerwe continue to.
- speakerYou go now Mary.
- speakerOkay, you know how the process
- speakerworked through PNC, endless.
- speakerAnd we read dossier after
- speakerdossier and
- speakerwe were asking for somebody to do
- speakera particular combination of jobs
- speakerand when we saw Janie's dossier we
- speakerthought she's wonderful.
- speakerThis is, as
- speakerfar as qualifications as far as
- speakerexperience as far as the kinds of
- speakerparticular things she's worked on.
- speakerThis is the best one we've seen so
- speakerfar.
- speakerWe also recognized
- speakerthat she was an out lesbian
- speakerand that this was wasn't a problem.
- speakerWe kind of looked at each other and
- speakersaid.
- speakerNot really.
- speakerWe had.
- speakerWell Chuck, trying to think of
- speakeranybody else but we had at least one
- speakerout gay guy on the team.
- speakerThis wasn't a problem.
- speakerWhat was a little bit of a problem
- speakerwas that she lived in California.
- speakerBut the reason she'd
- speakersent her resume again
- speakerwas because Carol
- speakerBonner who was a childhood
- speakerfriend of hers and they'd been
- speakerat family summer cottages
- speakeron Lake Erie Beach not far from when
- speakerI where I went to a Lake Erie summer
- speakercottage with my aunt and uncle.
- speakerWe learned to swim in the same
- speakerfairly polluted Lake Erie water.
- speakerAnyway they
- speakerwere still friends and still
- speakercorresponded she said, "Well Janie
- speakeris going to be visiting her family
- speakerup at the lake.
- speakerThey still have a cottage there.
- speakerThat's not far.
- speakerThat's like a two hour drive.
- speakerCan we time an interview to when
- speakershe's visiting?"
- speakerAnd this is unimportant but it
- speakersays something about how
- speakerinformal everything was right away.
- speakerShe came and
- speakerit was a very hot August day and
- speakershe was feeling a little flustered
- speakernot because of the interview but
- speakerbecause that morning before
- speakershe left her father had fallen off a
- speakerladder.
- speakerAnd well he turned out not to be
- speakerhurt and it meant rushing around and
- speakerdoing x rays and stuff and I'm still
- speakersupposed to be there.
- speakerShe was kind of in that mood.
- speakerBut we talked and
- speakershe was great.
- speakerShe had experience with all of these
- speakerthings.
- speakerShe was energetic
- speakershe was outgoing.
- speakerShe was interested in working here.
- speakerShe was not put off by Rochester
- speakerwinters.
- speakerShe had grown up in Pittsburgh
- speakerand kind of understood that the
- speakerNortheast
- speakerwinter is the first of
- speakerNovember till the end of April.
- speakerBut other seasons get packed in
- speakeraround the edges.
- speakerAnd we were really excited.
- speakerGo ahead.
- speakerYour turn.
- speakerSo when.
- speakerWhen we reached that part, really
- speakerand truly it was
- speakera lesson learned by
- speakerme because I did not know
- speakernothing about gay or lesbian
- speakerpeople. I did not know.
- speakerThat was.
- speakerAnd when they compare it
- speakerthe comparison was like America
- speakerstuff did to America
- speakerin black and white.
- speakerSo when I when I gave
- speakerit to see that.
- speakerI said but that's the same
- speakerpattern
- speakerfor the Black
- speakerunder White Americans
- speakerand is the same way they're treating
- speakerpeople lesbian or
- speakergay.
- speakerAnd I keep wondering that.
- speakerThat's one of the biggest why I had
- speakerbecause I couldn't I couldn't
- speakeradjust myself to ignoring that
- speakerpeople have reached out beyond
- speakertheir limit to get in
- speakerother people's lives to tell
- speakerthem what to do. And that was that
- speakerwas very puzzling
- speakerfor me.
- speakerThe more we go.
- speakerAnd the more we read and the more we
- speakertalk with her.
- speakerIf I'd know they are just humans
- speakerlike everyone else
- speakerand people should respect
- speakerpeople's privacy.
- speakerBut so far
- speakerthey didn't they just jab and jab
- speakerand jab. Well,
- speakerJanie.
- speakerShe had a stamina that
- speakershe just hold on and that
- speakerdidn't matter to her.
- speakerAnd that helps me
- speakerbecause I come from the Island
- speakerand I come into this strange world
- speakerand in a two
- speakerworld and you don't know which
- speakerside to take.
- speakerSo you have to treat everyone
- speakeraccording to who they
- speakerare.
- speakerAnd I start respecting everybody
- speakerfor the same.
- speakerWho they are.
- speakerThen Janie and I become good
- speakerfriends.
- speakerThe pattern was almost the same
- speakerand that that's when I get so
- speakerinterested in what
- speakershe was doing and not half
- speakerbeing whom they say she
- speakerwas.
- speakerBut the things how she did it
- speakerwith faith.
- speakerLove, energy
- speakerand this big smile.
- speakerShe'd never you never see her
- speakerfrown.
- speakerI never see her frown. Do you Mary?
- speakerNo.
- speakerAnd you're right about, God I'm
- speakergoing to quote that old Presbyterian
- speakerthing.
- speakerEnergy, imagination, intelligence
- speakerand love, she had it, has
- speakerit.
- speakerAnd anyway
- speakerwe finished that interview and I
- speakerremember going out to the car and
- speakersort of shivering this could be
- speakerhard. But if we're picking the
- speakerperson who has the best
- speakerqualifications and we'd interviewed
- speakerfive or six people at that point,
- speakerwow she has the best qualifications.
- speakerThat's what we should be doing.
- speakerAnd she says that she drove
- speakerback to her parents in the college
- speakerthinking.
- speakerIt won't go any farther than this.
- speakerBut they interviewed me
- speakerand they were only interested
- speakerin my job experience and what
- speakerI'd bring to this job.
- speakerThey didn't talk about
- speakeranything else.
- speakerThey were just
- speakerstraightforwardly not having the
- speakerlesbian thing be at all part of
- speakerit.
- speakerI'm really grateful for that.
- speakerI'm grateful for her telling us that
- speakerbecause that's what we wanted to do.
- speakerWe were not saying
- speakerwell check off.
- speakerLet's see we need
- speakera person over 55, a person of color,
- speakerwomen. Okay.
- speakerThat checks a couple of boxes.
- speakerIt was it was just
- speakergood. But then we needed to move
- speakeron to the next steps in the process.
- speakerAnd we talked it over among
- speakerourselves.
- speakerYeah.
- speakerAnd
- speakerwe all liked her
- speakerand we all thought that she was
- speakerwithout question extremely well
- speakerqualified would do a great job
- speakerbut there was there was
- speakeranxiety more anxiety for some people
- speakerthan others.
- speakerAnd at the beginning we were
- speakerdivided.
- speakerWe kept saying.
- speakerWe're still going to need to
- speakerrecognize these
- speakerreally good qualifications when
- speakerthose of us who who wanted to were
- speakersaying we're not ready to give up on
- speakerthis.
- speakerAnd so we've talked.
- speakerWe began meeting every week, right?
- speakerEvery week.
- speakerThen we kept meeting more than once
- speakera week. Then we kept meeting so we
- speakerwere having more meals
- speakertogether than we did with our
- speakerfamilies.
- speakerAnd one little funny thing that
- speakerhappened that we both remembered
- speakerwhen we called each other a couple
- speakerof days ago to arrange this
- speakerwas
- speakerwe lived scattered all over the
- speakercounty.
- speakerTwo thirds of us were still working
- speakergoing home and coming back
- speakerwas hard.
- speakerAnd meeting in people's houses was
- speakerhard because everything
- speakerhad to be confidential.
- speakerWe met at Ginny's a whole lot
- speakerbecause she lived alone.
- speakerAnd she was not going to make
- speakeranybody forced to stay in the
- speakerbedroom all evening while we talked
- speakerbecause this was very confidential.
- speakerWe met out at John Hardy's once he
- speakerhad two little kids at the after.
- speakerAt the end of the afternoon it was a
- speakerlovely place and a great place for
- speakeran interview, nice fireplace.
- speakerHis wife came in and she said
- speaker"We're not doing it here again.
- speakerDo you realize I have trumped around
- speakerin the snow with little Christopher
- speakerwith the baby on my back for three
- speakerhours because you need so
- speakermuch privacy. Go someplace else."
- speakerBut we we did know that we needed
- speakerto keep it confidential
- speakeruntil we were rock solid sure.
- speakerAnd so we would meet
- speakerhere upstairs and two of
- speakerthe guys made a specialty
- speakerof looking for all the pizza coupons
- speakerin the paper.
- speakerSo we were not worried about
- speakergood pizza just cheap pizza
- speakerwhich we ate till
- speakerwe wondered whether we could ever
- speakerface it again.
- speakerAnd we talked and thought and
- speakergot down to just a couple of
- speakerholdouts and
- speakerthen a part of me wasn't
- speakersurprised.
- speakerI was in a little odd position in
- speakerthis my husband
- speakerto whom I was still married at that
- speakerpoint I had found
- speakerout few years before it was gay
- speakerand we were struggling with
- speakerwhat did we do.
- speakerBecause the fact that you find
- speakerthis out means that many parts
- speakerof the marriage aren't working but
- speakerit doesn't mean that you don't care
- speakera great deal about each other.
- speakerAnd I realized
- speakerJanie had been through the same
- speakerthing. And Roger was not out at
- speakerwork because
- speakerhe was a professor
- speakerat the community college.
- speakerBut teachers weren't out the member
- speakerof our committee who was a teacher
- speakerwasn't out.
- speakerIt was it wasn't out
- speakerand taught deliberately in a town
- speakerthat's 30 miles away so that his
- speakerprivate life and his school life
- speakerwere completely separate worlds.
- speakerIt didn't surprise me very much that
- speakerthe person that was
- speakerthe last holdout.
- speakerAnd so I went out to dinner with her
- speakerand after we talked long enough
- speakerI found out that her son was gay and
- speakerthat she was struggling with it so
- speakerhard because
- speakerat that point
- speakeras you said there was so much
- speakerprejudice. It was such a struggle.
- speakerAnd so
- speakerwe worked and worked and worked
- speakerto talk
- speakerit out.
- speakerYeah in the same day I remember we
- speakerwere still,
- speakerwe had so many candidates.
- speakerOh we still had like 50.
- speakerWe saw
- speakerabout four or five of them.
- speakerAt least.
- speakerAt least before we picked Janie.
- speakerAnd did some phone interviews too.
- speakerAnd so we had we had comparisons.
- speakerWe just didn't see her and say
- speakeryes that we had we had
- speakerother interviews that we have went
- speakerto New York.
- speakerWhen, did I go to?
- speakerI didn't go to Chicago.
- speakerBut I went to different places
- speakerto meet those people and we have
- speakerthat comparison.
- speakerThat
- speakerbefore we say yes to Janie
- speakerwe just didn't see our answer come.
- speakerWe interview others
- speakerand then we were
- speakerrequested that, we were
- speakerbeing. We ask her.
- speakerIt was so
- speakerit was so knowledgeable.
- speakerYou know that
- speakershe show you that she was a people's
- speakerperson.
- speakerShe wasn't just for
- speakerthe gay and lesbian group,
- speakershe's for everybody
- speakerbecause I remember I ask her
- speakerif before we even
- speakerbefore we chose her.
- speakerI ask her,
- speaker"So Janie if the time
- speakerhas come if the time came
- speakerand we chose you to be our minister,
- speakerhow would you treat
- speakerthe congregation and
- speakereven in your preaching would you
- speakerjust preach for
- speakergay and lesbian?" She said "No
- speakerwe pay for the people
- speakerand not only for the people
- speakerin the church but for the
- speakercommunity." And that sort of
- speakertake a hold in me.
- speakerYou know she was.
- speakerShe was reaching beyond.
- speakerAnd when she preached a sermon
- speakershe might put two, one or two
- speakerlines in there about
- speakergay lesbian and transgender.
- speakerBut she'd never lay in it, just like
- speakeryou
- speakercome up today and you said the food
- speakerbag needs something.
- speakerThat's how she.
- speakerShe mix it in and just
- speakerkeep going until she reach
- speakerfor everyone in the community and
- speakerin the church.
- speakerAnd I respect her for that.
- speakerI respect
- speakerher highly.
- speakerShe was she was a person's
- speakerpreacher. Yeah.
- speakerShe
- speakerwas a person's preacher.
- speakerShe'd done her.
- speakerWhatever the right word. I want to
- speakersay student preaching like student
- speakerteaching in Pittsburgh
- speakerat a mostly African American
- speakercongregation.
- speakerAnd I remember loving it when she
- speakersaid that when she went there that
- speakerthe minister who was supervising
- speakerwho said "Honey we're going to teach
- speakeryou to preach from the neck down."
- speakerAnd she tells
- speakeryou to walk around
- speakerand really reach into the
- speakercongregation but as you're talking
- speakerabout reaching to everybody.
- speakerI also realized instantly and
- speakerthis was important to me that
- speakershe was going to be able
- speakerto connect with people who were
- speakerbeing carefully invisible at that
- speakerpoint.
- speakerI was struggling.
- speakerRoger and I were struggling with
- speakerwhat to do.
- speakerStruggling worse because
- speakerand at this point
- speakeranything is quotable because
- speakerpeople have died.
- speakerYeah. People have.
- speakerPeople have died. Yeah. But we had a
- speakerwe had a meeting one evening.
- speakerThis is the story I told you on the
- speakerphone. Yeah it's pretty good.
- speakerWe had a PNC meeting at Virginia's
- speakerhouse which was a townhouse
- speakerdowntown and
- speakergreat place because as we said we
- speakerhad privacy but it also was a very
- speakercomfortable place to meet.
- speakerThis was the weekend that Janie was
- speakerhaving this sort of big full
- speakerweekend interview thing that you do
- speakerwhen you're getting to that major
- speakerfinal interview.
- speakerSo she had that
- speakerinterview that evening with us with
- speakerdinner and then something on
- speakerSaturday morning and Saturday
- speakerafternoon somebody was going to give
- speakerher the drive around town
- speakerto see places she might live
- speakerand look at neighborhoods or
- speakeranything else she wanted.
- speakerAnd then Monday morning she was
- speakergoing, or Sunday morning she was
- speakergoing to preach. So she had a very
- speakerfull schedule
- speakerand we had
- speakera room for her at the Strathallan Hotel
- speakerwhich
- speakeris a very nice.
- speakerWhat do
- speakerI want to say?
- speakerTt's a very sort of low key elegant
- speakerdignified hotel
- speakeron East Avenue not
- speakernear any other hotels,
- speakerover kind of near the Science Museum
- speakerand the Art Gallery and that sort of
- speakerthing.
- speakerOkay.
- speakerAs the meeting broke up.
- speakerI want badly to talk to her.
- speakerI had hardly anybody that I could
- speakertalk to about the HIV thing it was
- speakerthe point where it was still really
- speakerreally bad.
- speakerIt was like having leprosy.
- speakerAnd
- speakerI had still teenagers and Roger had
- speakerbeen given five years to live it was
- speakerpretty rugged.
- speakerHe lived a lot longer.
- speakerNew drugs came in.
- speakerBut we were divorced amiably
- speakerlater. Lots of good things happened.
- speakerBut she had already said
- speakerthat she and Jim had managed to
- speakerhave a
- speakerpretty
- speakeramiable and what I'd call a good
- speakerdivorce that let them continue to
- speakersupport each other recognizing the
- speakerdifferences in sexuality. That was
- speakerwhat I was hoping for.
- speakerAnd so I said "Could you stay just a
- speakerlittle bit after with me to talk?"
- speakerAnd we did.
- speakerAnd she was wonderful
- speakerjust having somebody to talk to was
- speakersuch a relief.
- speakerI said I can drive you back to the
- speakerhotel that's easy.
- speakerStill talking intently
- speakerprobably at one o'clock in the
- speakermorning on a very snowy night,
- speakerthe snowy night matters.
- speakerI drove her back pulled
- speakerup into the loop and watched her go
- speakerinside. I would want to be sure
- speakershe was all safe inside
- speakerand went up to
- speakerthe desk was closed but where there
- speakerwere clearly desk kind of things.
- speakerAll right she's all safely inside.
- speakerBut things are fine.
- speakerI'll go home.
- speakerAnd I did.
- speakerSo I didn't find out what happened
- speakertill the next morning.
- speakerOh my God.
- speakerAnybody who could handle this with a
- speakersense of humor deserves everything.
- speakerIt wasn't the hotel.
- speakerIt was an apartment building that
- speakerlooked a whole lot like it.
- speakerShe didn't know the street number
- speakerof the hotel.
- speakerUsed to San Francisco which
- speakerat least is a little more alive at
- speakernight and has more payphones.
- speakerAnd this is a totally not alive at
- speakernight street.
- speakerIt has museums and churches.
- speakerAnd dignified things like the
- speakerAssociation of what's it and what's
- speakerit but nothing
- speakercommercial.
- speakerThe only commercial thing really is
- speakerthis is this one hotel.
- speakerShe didn't know which direction to
- speakergo on the street that would get her
- speakerto the hotel.
- speakerShe started unfortunately in the
- speakerwrong direction.
- speakerThere was nothing.
- speakerShe said I'll get to a payphone.
- speakerThere aren't any pay phones on that
- speakerstreet. There's nothing
- speakeropen at all.
- speakerFinally she saw a light.
- speakerIt turned out to be the Convent
- speakerof the Sisters of the Sacred Heart,
- speakerwho have a school near there.
- speakerShe banged pretty hard.
- speakerIt was cold it was late she was
- speakerreally stuck she was feeling sort of
- speakerif this is a test of my resilience.
- speakerBoy they've given me a good one.
- speakerIt wasn't, it was a mistake.
- speakerBut anyway finally one of the
- speakersisters came down in her bathrobe,
- speakerlet her in, saying
- speakervery sweetly when Janie explained
- speakerwhat she was doing and who she was.
- speakerWell we're having a really
- speakerecumenical night and
- speakergot a phone book, found the address,
- speakerturned her around in the right
- speakerdirection, told her which side of
- speakerthe street it was and what to look
- speakerfor.
- speakerAnd she probably still had a good 20
- speakerminute walk because she walked quite
- speakera way in the wrong direction.
- speakerBut she got in and the next morning
- speakertold us the story but just
- speakerlaughed about it didn't complain
- speakerand now 20 odd
- speakeryears later
- speakerif I see her or to talk to her.
- speakerAll we have to do is say the
- speaker"Strathallan Hotel" and both of us
- speakerjust crack up because
- speakernow that she was warm and dry
- speakerit was pretty funny but not
- speakerthe last thing in the world we would
- speakerhave wanted to do to somebody the
- speakernight before a very tiring day of
- speakerinterviews.
- speakerSo that's it's
- speakera little adventure of mine but it
- speakeralso says something about the person
- speakerthat she is and was.
- speakerYeah it really does.
- speakerSo then when you did decide
- speakerto call Janie.
- speakerWere you prepared for
- speakerwhat came after that?
- speakerWere you expecting it to be
- speakercontroversial?
- speakerNot the way it was.
- speakerYeah and we thought.
- speakerWe mentioned
- speakerthat.
- speakerHow what you have to
- speakerwait to see how, l
- speakersaid this one is going to be
- speakerunhappy that one going to be
- speakerunhappy.
- speakerThat's only a guess work.
- speakerSo you have to wait and see.
- speakerAnd that was controversial.
- speakerI bet when she started
- speakerwhat I think
- speakera lot of people had gotten
- speakera lot out of
- speakerher being here because
- speakerI know they
- speakerthere's so many people who
- speakerI know that I didn't know
- speakerwho they were.
- speakerThey came out and said who they
- speakerwere.
- speakerAnd if you have to talk with them
- speakeryou come like there's a burden
- speakerlift off their shoulder and
- speakerthey just feel happy that they are
- speakerwho they are and they're not
- speakerashamed to say who we
- speakerwere.
- speakerSo and
- speakerpeople in good position to not
- speakerjust cheap
- speakernot just treat people I mean people
- speakerof good authority and they
- speakerfeel good about knowing who
- speakerthey are and why
- speakerthey were so afraid.
- speakerThey feel glad that they're
- speakerthat they're in the position.
- speakerLike the guy at the City Hall on the
- speakercity council, he
- speakerwas shy and you see him
- speakertoday you tell him you said oh
- speakeryou wouldn't like to know the
- speakerburden.
- speakerIt's you know and
- speakerI feel the same way too being a
- speakerforeigner
- speakerand sometimes you're talking
- speakerand you don't know
- speakerwhat to say how to say, you know
- speakerwhat you want to say but you don't
- speakerknow how to say it
- speakerbecause you don't know if people are
- speakergonna accept it.
- speakerSo I could see where Janie
- speakerwas, where those people are coming
- speakerfrom.
- speakerSo we have we have a good bonding.
- speakerWe had the gay community, the
- speakerCaribbean.
- speakerWe have a good bonding because
- speakeris the same thing, stereotyping.
- speakerThere is
- speakersometimes
- speakerbut the language is
- speakerit really gets to you sometimes what
- speakeryou said. That too shall
- speakerpass.
- speakerThen you walk the walk of faith.
- speakerThis is where your faith comes in.
- speakerOkay you have to dwell faith to say
- speakerI'm not going to be like they are.
- speakerI want to be to show them this is
- speakerwhere God wants us to be
- speakertogether.
- speakerAnd if you want us to be together
- speakerwe have to walk as Christians
- speakerbecause I always said
- speakerto my first one of
- speakermy first Pastor Dave Dave
- speakerRomney used to say
- speakeryou carry yourself in such a way.
- speakerPeople could know that you're a
- speakerminister the way you walk
- speakerand the way your talk
- speakeryou're so polite in answering.
- speakerSo you'd know that there
- speakeris not only you doing it there have
- speakerto be a voice inside of you telling
- speakeryou be cordial
- speakerto anyone,
- speakerknow. And so that's the same
- speakerthing with us.
- speakerWe know you go here and oh boy.
- speakerYou don't know what to expect
- speakerand when it comes out you find out.
- speakerIt's such a great way
- speakerof seeing how people
- speakerwill react you know.
- speakerSo Janie make a big dent in
- speakerRochester, big,
- speakerbecause when
- speakerwhen she preaches
- speakerand they deal with that that
- speakersuddenly that church is packed.
- speakerThey got people coming from the East
- speakerWest North South just
- speakerto help them, just to have her
- speakersay something that can help
- speakerthem to hold onto,
- speakerhold on to Christ.
- speakerI know there's this guy.
- speakerAnd he was stay, he stayed in that
- speakerhotel right at Perinton and
- speakerEast Avenue.
- speakerAnd he said "Pearl you know I
- speakerhaven't been to church
- speakerfor a whole long
- speakerand once suddenly I came
- speakerto your church and that woman
- speakerlet me feel like coming out the
- speakerhouse." And
- speakerhe's out and he
- speakerteaches.
- speakerSo you wouldn't you would people
- speakerdon't talk what they're feeling
- speakeryou know and they make you feel
- speakeraccepted.
- speakerAnd that's one of the
- speakerbetter things in life
- speakerto feel accepted
- speakerfeel like you're a part of the
- speakercommunity.
- speakerAnd when they found out that she was
- speakera mother.
- speakerThat's that puts on another plus on
- speakerit.
- speakerBecause she know how to treat
- speakerkids and we'll
- speakerhave them feel no way of saying
- speakeryou're different or anything.
- speakerSo those were pluses
- speakerthat we have to give her for.
- speakerAnd then
- speakeryou have to turn around and look to
- speakerthe church to get people in the
- speakerchurch that give you the okay
- speakerto do the calling.
- speakerAnd the church did. What was the church's
- speakerreaction to calling Janie?
- speakerYeah. Yeah.
- speakerThey give you the okay
- speakerto do it and then you have to
- speakerlook on those people in the Session
- speakerand every
- speakerdeacons everything you said
- speakerthey have to be
- speakersome God.
- speakerYou know just said go and do that
- speakerbecause if they didn't tell us to do
- speakerit we couldn't do it.
- speakerBut they allow us to, they pick us
- speakerand say they go do the best
- speakeryou can.
- speakerAnd all of us
- speakerI think it was nine or eleven of us.
- speakerEleven.
- speakerEleven for us.
- speakerAnd I think we did the best we could
- speakerto reach to that plateau.
- speakerYou know because when
- speakerwhen she came I belongs to this
- speakergroup
- speakerof, we call it,
- speakerit used to be
- speakerover there off the Y
- speakerwhere
- speakerthey made a new Y and we had it
- speakerand they gave away,
- speakerthey move into the new Y yet they
- speakerleave these women of twelve
- speakerwith kids and they
- speakerwere kids themselves
- speakerin that building to fend for
- speakerthemselves.
- speakerNo adults just pure young
- speakerteenager have babies
- speakerbut they couldn't go to school
- speakerand the Y took them in and did
- speakerwhen the new Y moved they leave
- speakerthem twelve women and babies right
- speakerthere and this
- speakerlady about five of
- speakerthem get together
- speakerand hope the Sojourner House.
- speakerAnd then they moved them
- speakerinto the building on East Main then
- speakerthey get a
- speakerfire we move up to
- speakerthe 19th Ward.
- speakerSo anyway I was telling
- speakerJanie about it and she said
- speaker"Oh my God I have to see
- speakerI have to see that because I've
- speakernever." And you know.
- speakerWe call the director
- speakerand she she gave her, give her a
- speakerhouse tour of the Sojourner
- speakerHouse and to see from
- speakerwhence they came to
- speakerwhere they were going those are the
- speakerinterests she took in the
- speakerhuman beings and
- speakerthat make her exceptional knowing
- speakerthat black
- speakerwhite poor everybody
- speakeris in the same basket
- speakerhaving problems.
- speakerAnd she was very good in that.
- speakerHelp each other.
- speakerYeah.
- speakerYeah.
- speakerThat's
- speakergreat.
- speakerYeah.
- speakerThank you.
- speakerThanks.
- speakerSo there's
- speakerso much things she did in
- speakera simple way that some
- speakerpeople would never take it for
- speakernothing. What it means so much to
- speakerthe other person on the other side
- speakerto say it is
- speakerbut when it came to the
- speakertime where she
- speakerhad to go the church did you say
- speakergo. You
- speakerdidn't. I said yes.
- speakerWe cannot use you and we cannot.
- speakerThey make her an evangelist now.
- speakerHow much more could you ask for?
- speakerHow much more could you ask for?
- speakerHow much more could you ask for? Go tell it
- speakerto the mountain.
- speakerGo tell it to others. And look at the.
- speakerLook at the the depths that have
- speakerreached you know some
- speakerpeople you're talking to today and
- speakeryou say oh you know that woman
- speakerJanie Spahr maybe they've never met
- speakerher
- speakerwhat she she or she have the wing
- speakeron people just
- speakerlike a butterfly she dropped here
- speakerdrops there and people
- speakerjust pick up and keep hoping
- speakerand hoping to help themselves.
- speakerSo that's a
- speakergreat that's the great stuff she
- speakerhas done wonders.
- speakerShe really has.
- speakerShe has to
- speakerme for others I don't know.
- speakerBut for me she has done
- speakerwonders to help people mentally
- speakerphysically you
- speakerknow because when it comes
- speakerthe HIV and all that
- speakerstuff. She
- speakerworks right in there with them you
- speakerknow.
- speakerHealth wise and everything
- speakeris god bless her in way.
- speakerShe gives me out she gave me a
- speakergood I
- speakerhave a good grip on
- speakerlife because I know what her
- speakerroad their road and our road is the
- speakersame road we have to tread.
- speakerWe have to tread softly quietly
- speakerand hope
- speakerfor the best. With faith.
- speakerYeah.
- speakerOkay Miss
- speakerMary.
- speakerWe can keep taking turns.
- speakerBoy I
- speakerlove hearing what you're saying.
- speakerYeah.
- speakerI love hearing what you're saying.
- speakerIt is good.
- speakerBut a couple of specifics from
- speakerthe PNC the night we
- speakercalled her finally we'd been
- speakermeeting and meeting and meeting thinking
- speakerwe finally okay
- speakerall eleven of us are on board we're
- speakerready because we
- speakerhad to get the office open and get
- speakerto a telephone because this was pre
- speakercell phone and we
- speakerwere all excited to call her.
- speakerAnd we realized it was three hours
- speakerearlier in California and
- speakerdarn it she was driving home from
- speakerwork. And wasn't home yet.
- speakerSo we all sort of sat
- speakerthere jumping up and down waiting
- speakerfor it to be late enough in
- speakerCalifornia to get hold of her.
- speakerSo by the time we did we were at
- speakera real pitch of.
- speakerIt's getting late here.
- speakerWe've all got to get home.
- speakerWe finally finally it's it's
- speakerall come together. And she said
- speaker"That's
- speakerwonderful. We all need to to
- speakerpray on it for another week."
- speakerSo we
- speakerall went home and prayed on it for
- speakeranother week praying rather hard
- speakerplease Janie say Yes.
- speakerAnd she did.
- speakerAnd then we moved on toward
- speakerthe
- speakerday that she was going to be introduced to
- speakerthe congregation.
- speakerBut before that, where did
- speakerwe. Which church did we use her
- speakerfor.
- speakerThe candidating one?
- speakerI don't recall.
- speakerI don't remember church but for
- speakerthem to come and give us the tests,
- speakerpreaching.
- speakerYeah probably because
- speakerwe did a whole bunch of different ones with different
- speakerpeople.
- speakerDifferent people.
- speakerI don't remember if it's
- speakerthat church down. Oh
- speakerforget what they called it.
- speakerBut what is a Presbyterian church.
- speakerBut we always have to find
- speakera Presbyterian church really.
- speakerReally.
- speakerYeah. They were free that time
- speakerthat they could do the test
- speakerpreaching and I forget which
- speakerchurch Janie
- speakerwent, then after that that we bring
- speakerout to the congregation.
- speakerThe day we brought her to the
- speakercongregation.
- speakerThat was the first that
- speakerwas the first time that I think we
- speakerrealized that we were off
- speakeron such a wild ride up
- speakertill then it had been a
- speakerlot of thinking and talking and learning but
- speakerin a kind of sitting
- speakeraround the table way.
- speakerAll right.
- speakerPeople
- speakerpeople weren't supposed to know
- speakeranything about it.
- speakerI mean that's the way it works.
- speakerUntil the day that you introduced
- speakerthe person to the congregation.
- speakerBut I'm sure that some of it had
- speakerleaked out.
- speakerAnd for that
- speakerday of calling somebody
- speakerand having the congregation meaning
- speakerthey were trying to get as many
- speakerpeople there as we could
- speakerI don't even remember what time of
- speakeryear it was except that it was
- speakercold and wet.
- speakerBut you know it's June.
- speakerWe've noticed it's cold and probably
- speakergoing to be wet too so
- speakerthat can keep people away.
- speakerBut people were making a tremendous
- speakereffort to get people there who
- speakercouldn't easily.
- speakerAnd we thought they're stacking it
- speakerwith old people.
- speakerAnd if somebody knows what's
- speakercoming they're stacking it hoping
- speakerthat that will get us in
- speakernegative thought. Because Jamie had
- speakersaid I won't come unless you have at
- speakerleast a 95 percent majority,
- speakernot 100. You can always have a
- speakercouple of people that are hold outs
- speakerbut this is going to be difficult.
- speakerWe need at least a 95 percent to get
- speakerthere.
- speakerSo we went through all of the
- speakernormal introducing and talking about
- speakerthings and then the PNC
- speakerand Janie had to withdraw
- speakerduring the congregational meeting.
- speakerUsually these things take 10
- speakerminutes.
- speakerThey're just a rubber stamp.
- speakerThis one wasn't going to be.
- speakerAnd we were
- speakersequestered in somebody's
- speakeroffice and we quite
- speakerquickly got tired of it.
- speakerIf it had been half an hour and
- speakerwe wanted to know what was going on.
- speakerSo we quietly
- speakerfeeling like kids.
- speakerWent out into the hall.
- speakerThere are swinging doors to the
- speakersanctuary you would have sort of a
- speakercrack. And like
- speakerkids we were all
- speakerkind of taking turns leaning up and
- speakerpeeking through the crack to see
- speakerwhat was happening.
- speakerWhat was happening was that Anthony
- speakerhad set up a mike.
- speakerAnd two lines doing
- speakerit just the way you do at General
- speakerAssembly or something.
- speakerPro and con, pro and con, pro and
- speakercon.
- speakerAnd there
- speakerwas one vote
- speakerand it was it was
- speakera substantial majority but not a
- speakergood enough majority.
- speakerBut instead of taking it he said I
- speakerthink we need to hear from more
- speakerpeople.
- speakerIt went on for three hours.
- speakerEvery time somebody needed to go to
- speakerthe bathroom
- speakerwe had to quickly leap away from the
- speakerfact that we were all just standing
- speakerthere and listening, leaning
- speakeron the door, listening at the crack.
- speakerPeople stayed and
- speakerstayed and stayed.
- speakerThe,
- speakerJohn was on the committee but he
- speakerwasn't chair. The wife
- speakerof one of the PNC members is a
- speakerQuaker, so she comes to the church
- speakerbut she's not a member so she can't
- speakervote.
- speakerSo we knew she was doing child care
- speakerupstairs but she hadn't planned to
- speakerfeed the kids lunch because we
- speakerexpected that she'd be doing
- speakerchildcare for 30 minutes, and it was
- speakernow way
- speakerinto the afternoon.
- speakerAnd somebody,
- speakerI don't remember who, realized what
- speakerwas going on and
- speakersent somebody else out to
- speakerget the supplies for Phoebe
- speakerto feed the kids upstairs.
- speakerPeople were starting to get worried
- speakerthat we had some very old people
- speakerthere who hadn't had lunch, that
- speakersomebody was going to think that
- speakersomebody was going to get low blood
- speakersugar or something and nobody left.
- speakerI don't remember whether
- speakerpeople. Somebody started handing out
- speakercrackers, but it was something like
- speakerthat.
- speakerWe had foraged here and there, you
- speakerknow the Sunday School graham
- speakercrackers and stuff.
- speakerBut this went on for,
- speakerI think till three o'clock and
- speakernobody had had lunch.
- speakerNobody was leaving.
- speakerIn fact people were afraid to go to
- speakerthe bathroom because they were
- speakerafraid. And
- speakerfinally around 3 o'clock.
- speakerWe heard something changing
- speakerand we got a 95 percent
- speakerand then suddenly everybody
- speakereverything capitulated.
- speakerPeople who had been holding off
- speakerbecause they thought it was
- speakerdifficult they were with
- speakerus. We were with them.
- speakerWe all went back in.
- speakerWe heard somebody saying
- speakerwe'll go down to Gayle's office to
- speakerget the PNC
- speakerand the PNC who had not been in Gayle's office.
- speakerIt's twelve thirty hastily tried
- speakerto look so we hadn't been
- speakerleaning out the cracks for hours
- speakerbut in a way it was absolutely
- speakerwonderful.
- speakerWe had people who were in their 90s
- speakergetting up and saying things like
- speaker"I belong to this church for
- speakermaybe 60 years.
- speakerAnd I was very active
- speakerin women's suffrage." I mean they were that old, and saying.
- speakerAnd and
- speakerI think that we need to vote yes.
- speakerLots of people who were
- speakercoming up with their walkers who
- speakerwho I think glancing
- speakeraround at the people who said we
- speakerjust don't really want to get into
- speakersuch a mess we're sure that
- speakerthey would not want to and they were
- speakersome of the most outspoken ones
- speakerthey'd been there for women's
- speakersuffrage.
- speakerThey'd been there for sanctuary.
- speakerThey'd been really active in civil
- speakerrights.
- speakerAnd they thought that it was time
- speakerthat we
- speakerspoke, stepped out in
- speakerfaith for what we believed was
- speakerright.
- speakerYeah and hold on and
- speakerfaith conquers all.
- speakerAnd held on.
- speakerAnd in a way that started
- speakera lot of very good
- speakerfeeling toward it.
- speakerAnd at that point.
- speakerWe thought we're past this.
- speakerAnd after all we're the ones who are
- speakergoing to be directly involved.
- speakerAnd so nobody else is
- speakergoing to get too excited.
- speakerAnd at first nobody else did.
- speakerAnd
- speakerthen the Presbytery started to
- speakeror not the Presbytery.
- speakerBut people began to call the
- speakerissue and complain.
- speakerAnd complain.
- speakerAnd this is when we changed from
- speakerwe were no longer the pastoral
- speakernominating committee theoretically
- speakerwe dissolved as soon as she
- speakerwas called.
- speakerHowever we were now the perpetual
- speakernominating committee which
- speakermet fairly often actually for
- speakerabout two more years.
- speakerAs a support group and
- speakermanaging some
- speakerof these things. The
- speakerday that I
- speakerdon't remember whether it was Presbytery
- speakeror Synod but we'd gotten fairly
- speakerfar up in the
- speakerjudicial process.
- speakerAnd then we got a
- speakernegative.
- speakerYeah a negative.
- speakerYeah. Then we were told no
- speakeryou can't again.
- speakerAnd we'd gotten so far we could
- speakerhardly believe it.
- speakerAnd
- speakerthat again was an
- speakeramazing day. I don't know where you
- speakerwere. I was teaching third grade
- speakeryou only
- speakerin those days again with
- speakerthe phone not even in
- speakeryour classroom but a phone shared by
- speakerseveral rooms.
- speakerYou don't get a personal phone call
- speakerunless your
- speakerchild was in the emergency room.
- speakerSuddenly somebody said "Mary
- speakerI'll watch your classroom you've got
- speakera phone call it's very important"
- speakerand I said "Well what happened?"
- speakerWhat happened was Ginny Davidson
- speakersaying that
- speakerthe vote had just happened.
- speakerIt had been bad.
- speakerAnd would I
- speakerwould we get down to church right
- speakerafter work like everybody come
- speakeras fast as you can.
- speakerShe said we're gathering up food.
- speakerWe're going to have to figure out
- speakerwhat to do.
- speakerSo I went
- speakerback to my class
- speakerand the teacher who had my class
- speakersaid "Has there been a death?"
- speakerI said no.
- speakerHe said "Because that's what you
- speakerlook like.
- speakerYou're in really bad shape.
- speakerLet me bring your kids over with my
- speakerkids, and we'll do something from
- speakernow till lunchtime." Said
- speaker"You're in really bad shape."
- speakerI was.
- speakerYeah but it works its way out there.
- speakerBut we came down.
- speakerIt turned out to be not so much so
- speakerthough by the afternoon
- speakerby the time I got out probably
- speakerearlier than a lot of people because
- speakera lot of people work until five
- speakerthirty and I left
- speakerthe second that my kids were out of
- speakerschool so I got down.
- speakerVirginia was briskly organizing
- speakerthings. The first thing I did
- speakerwas go over to Fabrics and Findings,
- speakerand I bought them out of rainbow
- speakerribbon every yard of
- speakerribbon that the store had
- speakerwhich was a lot of ribbon
- speakerand
- speakerand straight pins.
- speakerAnd make those.
- speakerYeah. Anyway we made we made
- speakerribbons. We came back.
- speakerI also, did
- speakerI go home? Or did we buy this?
- speakerOh I know. I think we bought it.
- speakerWe also bought something like 10
- speakeryards of rainbow fabric
- speakerand we covered a huge long table up
- speakerthere in the Halleck lounge
- speakerand people who weren't working
- speakerhad been on the phone to other
- speakerpeople. So people brought the food
- speakerbut it wasn't like the organized
- speakerpotluck where people planned what
- speakerthey brought.
- speakerIt was more than that people grab
- speakerwhatever they happened to have
- speakeraround that you can grab fast so
- speakerthat like all these half loaves of
- speakerbread and jars of peanut butter and
- speakerhunks of cheese and stuff on table
- speakerand a couple of more organized
- speakerpeople had brought down crockpots
- speakerand were making soup there because
- speakerpeople just came.
- speakerEverybody was wearing their work
- speakerbadges because nobody had
- speakergone home.
- speakerPeople were wearing scrubs because
- speakerthey hadn't gone home.
- speakerWe were just wearing it and we wound
- speakerup with I don't remember.
- speakerI can't have any idea how many
- speakerhundreds of people.
- speakerAnd we had a service of lamentation.
- speakerBy this time we were also be.
- speakerWell I guess this is about the
- speakerbeginning. We were used to the fact
- speakerthat we were going to have TV
- speakercameras
- speakeron the sidewalk and in worship and
- speakerpeople climbing around with
- speakermicrophones.
- speakerBut I remember that night thinking
- speakerwe don't know where we're going.
- speakerA lot of wilderness and no map.
- speakerBut we're going to be okay.
- speakerAnd I'm really happy to be in the
- speakerthick of it.
- speakerActually not fun having people
- speakerpoking in the surface with TV
- speakercameras and some of that
- speakergets scary
- speakerand a lot of people said
- speaker"We really support this
- speakerbut prefer to do it from a
- speakerdistance."
- speakerWhat of the big thing that comes
- speakerout of it though.
- speakerThe aftermath a lot of
- speakerthe woman in ministry have to give
- speakertheir hat
- speakerto Janie because she
- speakeropens the door
- speakerfor a woman to be
- speakerin ministry.
- speakerThey didn't want no woman and they
- speakerdidn't want no gay.
- speakerDouble team.
- speakerBut today we're having it in
- speakerso many different churches.
- speakerWoman and they're gay
- speakerand they don't have no backlash so
- speakerthey have they have to
- speakerlift their hat off to Janie.
- speakerMaybe they don't want to they might
- speakerthink because they're educated.
- speakerWhat that that note
- speakerof entrance all came
- speakerfrom that.
- speakerShe opened doors and opened doors
- speakerand opened doors.
- speakerShe opened the door for us as
- speakerforeigners too
- speakernot to take it slightly,
- speakerfight it and fight it with grace
- speakerand dignity.
- speakerThey would have no
- speakerrowdy cried crying
- speakerand calling the names and
- speakerjust go with it.
- speakerIn a spiritual way, in a blessed way
- speakerand it works its way.
- speakerIt works its way out.