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Paul Lamar oral history, 2021.
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- speakerThere we go, and we're recording.
- speakerHi, my name is David Staniunas.
- speakerI'm records archivist with the
- speakerPresbyterian Historical Society.
- speakerToday is the 18th of February,
- speaker2021.
- speakerAnd I'm in conversation with
- speakerPaul Lamar.
- speakerPaul, you are
- speakerthe son of the moderator, Robert
- speakerLamar.
- speakerThat's right.
- speakerI wondered if you would begin
- speakerby kind of
- speakertalking about your
- speakerfather's work as
- speakermoderator and kind of, you know,
- speakerhis legacy and kind of begin by
- speakerreflecting on that, that might be
- speakertoo large to start.
- speakerWell, I'll I'll
- speakertry to find a way in.
- speakerYou know, Dad has been gone now two
- speakeryears. And as
- speakeryou know, there was a trove
- speakerof material, both personal and
- speakerprofessional, that
- speakerhe saved for many
- speakeryears through many moves and even
- speakera couple of fires.
- speakerWell, a fire which destroyed
- speakerother things, but thankfully didn't
- speakerdestroy a lot of the stuff that I've
- speakeralready sent you.
- speakerSo we have
- speakera lot that we did not want to
- speakerdispose of, but we wanted to
- speakermake sure got into the right hands.
- speakerAnd the letters
- speakerbetween him and his mother
- speakerback and forth for 13 years
- speakerwere absolutely wonderful.
- speakerAnd they've gone to his younger
- speakersiblings.
- speaker92 and 87
- speakerwho have enjoyed looking at
- speakersome of this correspondence because
- speakerthey're mentioned as little kids or
- speakerteenagers.
- speakerSo this has been a kind of heartfelt
- speakerjoy for them to recall
- speakertheir childhood.
- speakerAnd then, of course, I would say
- speakerthere are, as I have
- speakersent stuff to you and in fact,
- speakerhave some more that I'm preparing
- speakerto send to you,
- speakerI think of Dad's
- speakerdifferent churches that
- speakerhe served as well
- speakeras his year as moderator, as
- speakerwell as his participation
- speakerin reunion.
- speakerAnd those, for me, are kind of
- speakerthe major touchstones
- speakerof his ministry, which lasted
- speakerfrom 1945
- speakerto 1992 when
- speakerhe retired from First Presbyterian
- speakerChurch.
- speakerSo I don't know.
- speakerI think I can try
- speakerto thread this a little bit
- speakerto say what I think
- speakerhave been some constants in his
- speakerwork in his ministry.
- speakerAnd I go back to
- speakera letter that I found from
- speakerhis freshman year when he was in
- speakerYale in the spring when he talked
- speakerabout wanting to become a minister.
- speakerSo this was back in the spring
- speakerof 1940 when he really
- speakeridentified the ministry as something
- speakerhe wanted to do.
- speakerHe acknowledged that he was
- speakerhad been talking to older men
- speakerin religion and I assume
- speakersome ministers as well.
- speakerBut this was an early
- speakerinterest of his.
- speakerAnd after Yale, he went to Yale
- speakerDivinity School and with
- speakerhis characteristic characteristic
- speakerenergy and love for
- speakerchallenge, he
- speakerbecame a minister of a little church
- speakerthat was organizing as a
- speakerPresbyterian church and had already
- speakerbeen one, been a church.
- speakerBut this was in Milford,
- speakerConnecticut, in 1945.
- speakerAnd he was there as a Yale Divinity
- speakerSchool student, graduated in 46,
- speakerbut stayed on till 1950,
- speakerhelping to build the church
- speakerliterally.
- speakerAnd you will get a picture in fact
- speakerin the next week of him in his shirt
- speakersleeves and
- speakerthere, helping to build
- speakerbuild the actual building.
- speakerSo, so went to
- speakerand then he went to Stamford,
- speakerConnecticut, where he was involved
- speakerin the building of yet another
- speakerstructure, the famous Fish
- speakerChurch.
- speakerI don't know if that's familiar to
- speakeryou?
- speakerVery much so.
- speakerIs it?
- speakerYes.
- speakerYes.
- speakerSo he was there until 1958
- speakerand was
- speakerinstrumental, I think I would say,
- speakerin terms of the vision of
- speakercreating a new structure
- speakerfrom an 1880s
- speakerchurch that was torn down.
- speakerAnd then this new one was built,
- speakerI would say, that
- speakerhe was always,
- speakerI won't say one step ahead, but he
- speakerwas always looking ahead and
- speakerhe was looking ahead in terms
- speakerof individual churches that he
- speakerserved and he was looking ahead
- speakerculturally to what
- speakerwe could do better all
- speakerthe time.
- speakerAnd I came across a sermon.
- speakerAnd David, if I'd mentioned it to
- speakeryou, I'm I
- speakerapologize for repeating it.
- speakerBut it talked about
- speakerhe this was 1955
- speakerand he said there was
- speakera new
- speakercommittee that was being proposed
- speakeron desegregation.
- speakerAnd his comment was,
- speakerit's a shame that we
- speakereven have to have such a committee.
- speakerAnd his sermon was about
- speakermarginalized people
- speakerat the time
- speakertalking about immigrants and talking
- speakerabout African Americans,
- speakeretc.
- speakerSo he was speaking
- speakerto white congregations for the most
- speakerpart, all in all his career.
- speakerThese were established
- speakerchurches that
- speakerwere basically white.
- speakerBut he was always, as I say,
- speakerbecause of a real commitment,
- speakera real belief, real philosophy
- speakerthat the wider
- speakerworld needed to be embraced and
- speakerthat wider world was
- speakerlocal.
- speakerIt was urban.
- speakerAnd then beyond
- speakerthat, it was the other
- speakerstream and his ministry was
- speakerecumenism.
- speakerHe became
- speakervery deeply connected with
- speakerour bishop here in Albany.
- speakerAnd rabbis in
- speakerAlbany formed a famous
- speakertriumvirate of people
- speakerwho wanted to bridge
- speakerthe faiths.
- speakerSo again, looking
- speakerbeyond Presbyterianism
- speakerexclusively and thinking about how
- speakerto.
- speakerHow to reach out to the wider
- speakerreligious world and that
- speakerthat was important to him.
- speakerSo your father was
- speakerthe moderator of the
- speakerJoint Committee on Reunion
- speakerstarting in 1969.
- speakerYes, and it was
- speakerachieved 14 years later.
- speakerThe
- speakerfascinating series of stories,
- speakerbecause, I mean, the kind of
- speakerearliest gestures toward
- speakerfull Presbyterian reunion start
- speakerin like the twenties with
- speakerthe efflorescence of
- speakerthe ecumenical movement.
- speakerYes.
- speakerDo you
- speakerI'm
- speakerI'm beginning to think about
- speakerthis because
- speakerwhen he
- speakerbecame moderator in 1974,
- speakerthe church has just kind of crested
- speakerover a series
- speakerof events that would
- speakerreally like transform
- speakerboth the UPCUSA and the
- speakerold PCUS.
- speakerThe church's response to
- speakerJim Forman and the Black Manifesto,
- speakerthe kind of.
- speakerThe call for reparations
- speakerand the church's establishment of
- speakerthe Committee on Self Development of
- speakerPeople, the
- speakerchurch's response
- speakerto an overture
- speakerto support the legal defense
- speakerof Angela Davis, and then
- speakerthe backlash against
- speakerthat decision. The
- speakerchurch elected the first female
- speakermoderator in Lois Stair.
- speaker69, 70, 71, and 74.
- speakerYour father is moderatorial year
- speakerhappens in Louisville, Kentucky,
- speakerwhere eventually, you
- speakerknow, all of the national
- speakeragencies decamped to
- speakerin 1988.
- speakerSo it's kind of a precursor to that.
- speakerYeah.
- speakerAnd in
- speaker74, so after
- speakerthis kind of period of intense.
- speakerUpheaval probably.
- speakerUpheaval yeah, activity and then
- speakerback and forth.
- speakerRight, right.
- speakerAnd your father comes
- speakerin as moderator and I'm just going
- speakerto quote from this one New York
- speakerTimes article at the time,
- speakerLamar explained at a news conference
- speakerthat although he was a social
- speakeractivist, he felt recent
- speakerannual General Assembly that
- speakerstressed the social dimension, New
- speakerYork Times, without equal weight to
- speakerpiety, a stake
- speakeris not keeping these in
- speakerbalance.
- speakerInteresting.
- speakerWhich would not be so
- speakerpublicly like at a press conference.
- speakerRight.
- speakerTo deal with The New York Times,
- speakerhe's emphasizing or he's
- speakerattempting to kind of deemphasize
- speakerthe.
- speakerThe social
- speakeractivism of the church
- speakervia like CORAR,
- speakeryou know.
- speakerAnd I wonder if you had encountered
- speakeranything in
- speakerhis correspondence or sermons to
- speakerkind of like flesh
- speakerout that idea.
- speakerWell, no, this
- speakeris to be perfectly
- speakerhonest, David. This is new
- speakerto me that that he would make a
- speakerdistinction or I don't
- speakereven want to say because I do not
- speakerthink of him as someone who would
- speakerturn his back
- speakeron things, on progress.
- speakerI don't know why.
- speakerInteresting use of the word piety.
- speakerI wonder if
- speakerI almost was going to fill it in
- speakerbefore you actually use the word to
- speakersay if a return to scripture
- speakeror return to
- speakerconventional religious
- speakerdiscussions striking
- speakera balance between don't
- speakerforget our Presbyterian faith,
- speakerwhatever that means and how it is
- speakerwitnessed in the wider world.
- speakerBut that's an interesting point.
- speakerSo that's something I would have to
- speakerdigest to say,
- speakerOK, that's you know,
- speakerthat's.
- speakerObviously, that's a perspective
- speakerwith which I'm not familiar.
- speakerLet's put it that way.
- speakerAnd, you know, honestly, when you
- speakerlook at it, you may think it may
- speakerjust be a matter of The New York
- speakerTimes reporting on
- speakerthe activities of Presbyterians
- speakerwithout really understanding where
- speakerthey came from,
- speakeryou know, because it's very easy to
- speakerlike.
- speakerPeople who aren't acquainted with
- speakerthe tradition haven't heard about,
- speakerlike the,
- speakeryou know, the struggles of the 1860s
- speakerand the I'm going
- speakerto mess this up, but the doctrine of
- speakerthe purity of the church.
- speakerRight. Which was basically the
- speakerargument that the church
- speakershould be focused on God
- speakerand God alone and not
- speakerintervene in secular
- speakeror civil matters.
- speakerIt sounds like The New York Times is
- speakerbasically stuck there.
- speakerRight?
- speakerRight.
- speakerIt I'll say one thing
- speakerand it's funny.
- speakerI it would be difficult
- speakerfor me to speak about
- speakerPresbyterianism
- speakerbecause a long time ago
- speakerI left the
- speakerchurch. I left any kind of
- speakerorganized religion really as
- speakera as a college student.
- speakerSo, you know, your information,
- speakeryour reference to
- speakerother events in the history of the
- speakerchurch.
- speakerIt would would be new to me
- speakerand my father and I
- speakerand would
- speakerprobably not talk
- speakerparticularly about
- speakerthe specifics of the church.
- speakerIn other words, I think I stood
- speakerback and watched him move
- speakerin the wider world
- speakerwith admiration and said,
- speakeryes, he he
- speakeris a person who is interested
- speakerbeyond
- speakerthe confines of what's been given to
- speakerhim and where he might
- speakerchoose happily to operate
- speakerif he didn't want to operate
- speakerand believe that that was a calling
- speakerto operate beyond the scope of
- speakerhis small sphere.
- speakerSo that's
- speakerit's a very generic
- speakerway to look at
- speakerhis life's work, I suppose.
- speakerBut that's that's where it is, you
- speakerknow. And I think if you asked any
- speakerof our my two brothers
- speakerand sister, we would all
- speakersay in part, we chose
- speakerour careers, two teachers
- speakerand a social worker
- speakerwho because of
- speakerthe interest and the examples
- speakerof both my father and my
- speakermother,
- speakerwho was equally
- speakerpassionate about
- speakerthe other, equally passionate
- speakerabout the wider world.
- speakerSo, yeah.
- speakerYeah, I'm not
- speakergoing to harp on this, but it just
- speakerit I think.
- speakerSeeing the difference between you
- speakerknow, the account of Robert
- speakerLamar that's in the records and the
- speakeraccount that is public in The New
- speakerYork Times.
- speakerRight.
- speakerWas really just a reminder to me
- speakerthat
- speakerpiety and work
- speakerin the civil or secular
- speakersphere are not
- speakerthey're not distinct in the
- speakerPresbyterian tradition.
- speakerRight?
- speakerThe whole the church's work
- speakerin the 69 to 71
- speakerperiod is
- speakerentirely derived from the
- speakerpassage of the Confession of 1967.
- speakerIt flows directly out of
- speakerlike this is, you
- speakerknow, Presbyterians are called
- speakerupon to
- speakerreconcile the world.
- speakerWork of reconciliation was what
- speakerthe assembly believed it was doing.
- speakerRight.
- speakerFrom 69 to 71. It's one
- speakersolid continuum.
- speakerYeah.
- speakerYou
- speakermentioned kind of
- speakerstepping back from
- speakerorganized religion
- speakeras like an 18 year old.
- speakerWould you are you comfortable
- speakertalking about that and how that kind
- speakerof realization came about?
- speakerOh, sure, sure.
- speakerAnd it's probably,
- speakerDavid, kind of lazy realization.
- speakerI hate to say it, but my interests,
- speakerI think and interestingly,
- speakerI think I could speak for
- speakerprobably my siblings and
- speakereven my late mother
- speakerto say that all of us
- speakerwere admiring of our
- speakerfather.
- speakerAll of us
- speakerresponded to the example
- speakerof.
- speakerAlways reaching out,
- speakeras I say, always thinking ahead
- speakerand trying to be a servant in
- speakerthe larger world,
- speakerbut we all chose different paths
- speakerand along the way
- speakerdeveloped different interests
- speakerand just.
- speakerLeft the church and I would
- speakersay, to be very
- speakerhonest, I would say the
- speakerfour of us kids have turned out
- speakerto be either agnostics or atheists,
- speakerbut maybe not even something so
- speakerdefined it's just
- speakerthat we
- speakerare not religious.
- speakerAre we spiritual, perhaps,
- speakerbut I'm not even sure about
- speakerall that.
- speakerSo I do
- speakerremember I can tell you a moment
- speakerwhere and if this is of any
- speakerinterest. But in my senior year I
- speakerwas also at Yale and my senior
- speakeryear I was asked by a friend
- speakerwho was a year older if I would
- speakerlike to become a deacon in
- speakerBattell Chapel.
- speakerAnd William Sloane Coffin was
- speakerthe minister at the time.
- speakerAnd I knew Coffin.
- speakerAnd I was
- speakervery flattered
- speakerwhen David
- speakerasked me about that.
- speakerAnd then I thought and I wrote
- speakerto Coffin and
- speakersaid I would be disingenuous
- speakerif I said yes to this, because
- speakerI don't feel I
- speakerdon't feel what I think is required
- speakerof a deacon, which is
- speakera piety and and a belief
- speakerin the larger system that I,
- speakeras a student deacon, would be
- speakerserving.
- speakerNow, I don't I didn't know
- speakerthe full scope of what a deacon did,
- speakerto be honest.
- speakerBut I had a sense that
- speakerthis was probably not
- speakerthe right position and that it
- speakerwould be inappropriate of me
- speakerbecause I knew my own spiritual
- speakerlack of interest to
- speakersay, yes, I'd be part of that, just
- speakerto be part of it.
- speakerSo I do remember
- speakerthat that was a moment where I
- speakerconfronted something and said, no,
- speakerI don't want I can't be part
- speakerof this because I would be insincere
- speakerand I didn't want to be insincere.
- speakerAnd so. Yeah.
- speakerAnd so
- speakergrowing up in Albany,
- speakeryou know.
- speakerWere.
- speakerI mean, you've mentioned, like the
- speakerkind of transformations that have
- speakerthat happen to like all families.
- speakerPeople come and go from traditions
- speakerpretty flexibly.
- speakerOne, a former
- speakerstated clerk and a good friend
- speakerof ours Gradye Parsons
- speakerused to talk about the Presbyterian
- speakerfamily as
- speakerand religion in America as
- speakerbeing like basically
- speakerat this point,
- speakerlike a la carte,
- speakeryou know, you can have
- speakerfamily that's Methodist one week and
- speakerBaptist another week people marry
- speakerinto
- speakerRoman Catholicism.
- speakerAnd so
- speakerit's not your grandpappy's
- speakerPresbyterianism.
- speakerRight.
- speakerYour family's experience is common
- speakerand shared by many, many people.
- speakerSo you did you did most of
- speakeryour growing up in Albany?
- speakerWell, I'd say split.
- speakerNo, most of it probably in
- speakerStamford.
- speakerWe moved to Albany when I was 13.
- speakerAnd so I had high school here
- speakerin Albany.
- speakerEighth grade and high school.
- speakerBut and I have my younger
- speakersiblings. I'm the oldest of the four
- speakerhave, of course, different
- speakermemories of both Stamford
- speakerand even Milford and
- speakerand Albany.
- speakerBut one of the other things that
- speakerto say something about our
- speakercoming to Albany and Dad and the
- speaker60s, it's interesting.
- speakerI think that Dad, when he looked
- speakerback at he was
- speakerof a certain age.
- speakerHe was in his early 40s when the
- speaker60s came.
- speakerSo he had a certain degree of
- speakerexperience as well
- speakeras energy.
- speakerAnd and I
- speakerthink it was a good combination
- speakerof the man for
- speakerthe time period.
- speakerIn other words, the world was
- speakerexciting.
- speakerThe world was demanding more
- speakerdifferent things.
- speakerAnd, you know,
- speakerhe had an appetite for
- speakerfor what was going on.
- speakerAnd I'm thinking of a few things
- speakerthat happened just locally.
- speakerThe church, the First Pres
- speakerjoined with a Baptist Church
- speakerand another Presbyterian
- speakerchurch and a Methodist
- speakerchurch in the downtown
- speakerarea, and they became a group
- speakerwhich still exists called the Focus
- speakerChurches.
- speakerAnd the point of this was to take
- speakerthese four congregations,
- speakerwhich were made up
- speakerin many cases of
- speakersuburban families
- speakerand make them responsive
- speakerto or help them become
- speakerresponsive to the needs
- speakerof urban people of
- speakerurban neighborhoods.
- speakerSo this group developed, I
- speakerthink, in about 1966
- speakeror 67.
- speakerAnd
- speakerso they pooled ideas,
- speakerresources, money
- speakerto create these
- speakerfocused churches.
- speakerAnd then over time,
- speakerthey invited other churches
- speakerto to join this
- speakerthis quartet and
- speakerto increase the outreach.
- speakerSo that was one manifestation
- speakerof of why
- speakerthe 60s were exciting, I
- speakerthink, and important to
- speakerto Dad in terms of
- speakerreaching out and crossing barriers,
- speakeret cetera.
- speakerYeah, yeah.
- speakerIt's interesting.
- speakerAnd it's a testament to his
- speakercommitment
- speakeras an ecumenist
- speakerthat he worked at
- speakerthe national level and at the local
- speakerlevel, like equally
- speakerso.
- speakerYeah.
- speaker100 percent. And so.
- speakerYour.
- speakerWas your family, like, very much
- speakerinvolved in the ministry at
- speakerFirst Albany, or was it really
- speakerjust kind of dad's job
- speakerand.
- speakerWell, all of.
- speakerWell, let's see, all of us were
- speakerinvolved in the life of the church
- speakeras kids and teens.
- speakerIn other words, I did
- speakerwe all did a
- speakerkind of step stair
- speakerexperience, you know, being in Bible
- speakerschool and then being confirmed
- speakerand then you know senior high
- speakerfellowship, that kind of thing.
- speakerSo, yes, we all had that.
- speakerWe all also loved the people
- speakerin the church. I think if you asked
- speakerus were they part of our
- speakerlives, our community, the answer
- speakerwould be yes.
- speakerWe knew who everybody was.
- speakerAnd I
- speakeralways felt that this was a
- speakerfamily and a warm and wonderful
- speakerplace to be, you know?
- speakerSo. Yes, and
- speakerand my mother, too.
- speakerPerhaps God was not
- speakeryou know, we could go down another
- speakerroad, but I think
- speakerearly on she found
- speakerother outlets more social rather
- speakerthan religious outlets to
- speakerbe involved in.
- speakerSo she was not
- speakerand I'll go back to when I say this
- speakerexpression in the 50s,
- speakershe was not, I would say a
- speakertraditional
- speakerminister's wife, if I could even
- speakerbe so broad to say that
- speakerthat is she was not
- speakeractively involved in all
- speakeraspects of the church.
- speakerShe supported Dad
- speakerand obviously supported
- speakerof the family because Dad was very
- speakerbusy out all
- speakerthe time, you know, at one thing or
- speakeranother.
- speakerBut in terms of her response
- speakerto the larger world, it tended to
- speakerbe in community organizations
- speakerthat she was interested in.
- speakerAnd partly I think it was to say,
- speakerthis is my identity.
- speakerRight? I am
- speakerI I agree with
- speakerthe philosophy Dad has.
- speakerAbsolutely.
- speakerAnd just to tell you a
- speakerside note,
- speaker1952,
- speakerthey were stumping for Adlai
- speakerStevenson and
- speakerI was
- speakerseven years old.
- speakerAnd I remember coming into
- speakertheir bedroom the next morning
- speakerand I said did he win did he win?
- speakerAnd they said, oh no.
- speakerAnd I in my childish
- speakerway, I just, I was feeling crushed
- speakerby it and I said, Oh dear,
- speakerflash forward to 1956.
- speakerI'm a little older, the same
- speakerscenario. And I run, I go in and I
- speakersay, did he win, did he win?
- speakerThey said Oh no, no, no.
- speakerBut one of the things that connected
- speakerthem, David, and this is a
- speakerlittle bit of an aside, you
- speakerknow, ultimately they got divorced.
- speakerThey were married for 39 years
- speakerand ultimately got divorced,
- speakerbut they came
- speakerfrom
- speakersomewhat conservative families.
- speakerAnd in each case,
- speakereach of them stood out from the
- speakerfamily as being very liberal
- speakerDemocrats.
- speakerWhereas in other the
- speakerother family members, as I recall,
- speakerwere more Republicans.
- speakerSo my mom and dad, despite
- speakerwhatever ultimate differences they
- speakerhad politically
- speakerand socially, were always
- speakeron the same page and found great
- speakersupport in each other for
- speakerwhat they thought were
- speakerthe values in life and
- speakerwhat government should be and
- speakerhow government should be responsive.
- speakerSo we we always joke about it.
- speakerThe kids, you know, the four of us
- speakerwill say, oh, yes, they
- speakerthey formed this little nucleus
- speakerof the Democratic Adlai
- speakerStevenson support
- speakerand and the four of
- speakerus bingo.
- speakerThat's always the way or usually the
- speakerway. So anyway.
- speakerThat's a that's a great
- speakerstory.
- speakerIt's just a glimpse.
- speakerYeah.
- speakerAnd so, you know, you mentioned your
- speakeryour mother was kind of
- speakerduring this period discovering
- speakerher own identity, kind of the
- speakercommunity organizations.
- speakerDo you
- speakercan you reflect on, like
- speakersome aspects of your own
- speakerdiscovery of your identity
- speakergrowing up as a kid in the sixties?
- speakerYeah, sure.
- speakerWell.
- speakerYou know, it's a very
- speakerall of the I sometimes make
- speakerthe mistake, I have to remind myself
- speakerat the age of 75, I have
- speakerto remember that kids
- speakercoming up today, despite the
- speakerfact that there is a whole history
- speakerand a more open culture
- speakerthan when I was growing up.
- speakerNevertheless, have to do it
- speakerindividually.
- speakerOne by one.
- speakerThey have family and they have to
- speakerconfront the same things that
- speakeranybody always in the closet
- speakerhad to confront back in the day.
- speakerSo and
- speakerso. I am so glad
- speakerwe are where we are culturally.
- speakerBut it is a it's
- speakera personal journey.
- speakerAnd
- speakermy parents' openness, my parents
- speakerlove notwithstanding.
- speakerIt took a
- speakerwhile to
- speakercome to not to come to grips
- speakerwith who I am because I've known
- speakerthat.
- speakerSince five or six, and
- speakerthat's just the bottom line,
- speakerbut in terms of
- speakeracknowledging or behaving,
- speakernot until after college,
- speakeryou know, when I was in graduate
- speakerschool. Yeah.
- speakerSo when I was in graduate school, I
- speakerwas at Harvard Ed School in 1969
- speakerand.
- speakerI had spoken to my dad a little bit
- speakerearlier that this was what was going
- speakeron with me and
- speakerI don't even recall what words I
- speakermight have used, but I knew
- speakerthat he was someone I could speak to
- speakerand judgment would
- speakernot be forthcoming, that is, it
- speakerwould be only love and compassion
- speakeras well. As, you know, I'm not sure
- speakerwhat we do
- speakerbecause he didn't have a playbook at
- speakerthe time. And a lot of
- speakerinformation about, you know,
- speakerwhat does this mean, etc.
- speakerSo in 1969,
- speakerwhen I was starting graduate
- speakerschool, I decided,
- speakerwell, here I am in Boston and
- speakerbetter figure out what to do.
- speakerI went to a therapist and
- speakeragain, I'd gone to therapists
- speakerbefore. I went to a therapist in
- speakerone session.
- speakerAnd after that
- speakersession I said, this isn't
- speakergoing to work. I need to find out
- speakerwhat's what's going on.
- speakerSo I found a gay lib
- speakermeeting over at Boston University,
- speakerhitched up my big boy pants and
- speakertook the subway
- speakerto be you and,
- speakeryou know, walked, I've written
- speakerabout this and walked into.
- speakerAnd you're too young to know
- speakerthis, David, but walked into
- speakera smoke filled seminar
- speakerroom full of young.
- speakerI'm not that young.
- speakerOK, all right.
- speakerI,
- speakerI am I am part of the generation
- speakerthat still smoked in bars.
- speakerOh, OK. Alright.
- speakerOK, so you can remember this.
- speakerWell this was certainly a time when
- speakerpeople did and
- speakerso walked in and here were all,
- speakerhere were all these guys
- speakerin blue jeans, a blue work
- speakershirt, little Lennon glasses
- speakerand kind of wild
- speakerhair, all smoking and
- speakerarguing. And this was the most
- speakerremarkable moment when I said,
- speakerholy cow.
- speakerAnd, you know, there was no
- speakerroom at the table. I stood against
- speakerthe wall with some other guys and I
- speakersaid, just listened.
- speakerAnd these guys were passionate,
- speakerloud, funny, funny,
- speakeryou know, hysterical.
- speakerAnd and
- speakerI said, OK, guess what,
- speakerthis is family.
- speakerI'd arrived.
- speakerAnd so that's
- speakerthat was January of 70.
- speakerSo that's a long time ago.
- speakerBut.
- speakerSorry. Go ahead.
- speakerGo on, go on.
- speakerNo, just just to say, once
- speakerthat happened,
- speakeryou know, things began to
- speakerbe clear
- speakerin my own head, and
- speakerafter a short period
- speakerof time, I came out to
- speakermy parents probably.
- speakerProbably within a couple of years,
- speakerreally talking more openly
- speakerand openly with my siblings,
- speakertwo all of whom were
- speakerwere have been on
- speakerboard, have embraced
- speakerthe guys who have been in and out of
- speakermy life, including my husband now
- speakerof almost 22 years.
- speakerSo but
- speakerthe only the one thing I would say
- speakerwith respect to Dad and the church,
- speakerin about 19, I
- speakercame back to Albany in 1976
- speakerfrom Boston and
- speakermet a guy and lived
- speakerwith him and probably about
- speaker1978 or 79.
- speakerThe First Pres was
- speakerhaving discussions about gays
- speakerin the church.
- speakerOK, I don't know where that fit
- speakerin terms of the national discussion.
- speakerIf it was late, it was on time.
- speakerIf it was early,
- speakerI don't know. But the conversation
- speakerwas open.
- speakerAnd here I came back to Albany
- speakerand lived in the basement of the gay
- speakercommunity center with my
- speakerlover.
- speakerAnd like, I kind
- speakerof dragged my whole family out
- speakerwith me.
- speakerThey by necessity,
- speakerI was visible.
- speakerI spoke I was
- speakerin the newspaper.
- speakerI was on TV
- speakerand bless everybody
- speakerin my family for.
- speakerNot blinking, but just
- speakergoing along, and I have no idea
- speakerwhat any of them really
- speakerI could ask my siblings of what you
- speakerknow they experienced or
- speakerjudgment, etc., but
- speakerone day I was invited to go to the
- speakerchurch, First Pres after
- speakerthe service and talk about being
- speakergay.
- speakerAnd I got into a shouting
- speakermatch with one of the old members of
- speakerthe church and
- speakera kind of fury at
- speakerthe conservatism of,
- speakerI would say not necessarily
- speakerthe whole church by any means.
- speakerThere were a couple of
- speakerfolks who were thoroughly entrenched
- speakerin old views,
- speakerbut I
- speakercould not argue, David, from a
- speakerscriptural point of view,
- speakerI could not say anything that
- speakerwas specific to the church
- speakerand I
- speakerwas kind of winging it
- speakeron the basis of
- speakerthis just isn't right what you're
- speakertalking about, you know, how can you
- speakerthink this way?
- speakerSo I was coming from probably social
- speakerjustice and civil rights point
- speakerof view as opposed to
- speakera religious point of view.
- speakerAnd in retrospect, if
- speakerI had been more
- speakerthoughtful, I would have been able
- speakerto have a conversation
- speakerinstead of
- speakerjust kind of
- speakersaying saying some things
- speakerand doing the best I could in the
- speakermoment to talk to a different
- speakeraudience.
- speakerI was this was an
- speakeraudience that even though they knew
- speakerme, these were old
- speakerfriends and so forth.
- speakerSo maybe some of what I said was
- speakerI was reaching them,
- speakerbut I wish I could have spoken
- speakerthe language of the church
- speakerto them and presented
- speakeran argument.
- speakerAnd I didn't have that, so.
- speakerI got louder.
- speakerYeah,
- speakerI honestly, I think there are a
- speakerlot of Presbyterians who would
- speakerdisagree with your assessment and
- speakersay that the spirit is going
- speakerto move you how the spirit moves
- speakeryou. Probably the people in Albany
- speakerneeded to hear, you know, righteous
- speakerfury and frustration and anger.
- speakerYeah.
- speakerEntirely possible.
- speakerYou asked whether
- speakerthe kind of discernment that
- speakerFirst Albany was going through in
- speakerthis was 78 when you.
- speakerI'd say 78.
- speakerYeah.
- speakerWhether that was early or late.
- speakerI mean,
- speakerin truth, all of this is late.
- speakerLike any recognition of
- speakerour humanity comes too late.
- speakerBut the
- speakerUPCUSA started
- speakera 19 member
- speakercommittee and I looked it
- speakerup a second ago, committee to study
- speakerhomosexuality in
- speaker1976.
- speakerSo First Albany beginning
- speakerto engage
- speakerwith the national church's agenda
- speakerby 77 is like.
- speakerThey got the news and they said
- speakeralright.
- speakerYeah.
- speakerThe tradition is how we do
- speakerit, we just get together and talk
- speakerabout things and it's,
- speakeryou know, that's
- speakera remarkable story that they
- speakerthat you were available
- speakerto them and willing
- speakerto help them, kind of.
- speakerYou understand what was going
- speakeron, made a
- speakerlittle doubt in a way.
- speakerI think I think David, oh you know
- speakerthey were.
- speakerI'm glad you put it this way.
- speakerI was but one moment
- speakerin their self study.
- speakerRight? So I'm
- speakersure that there was preparation
- speakerfor this kind of
- speakerappearance.
- speakerRight? That they had had
- speakerconversations. They had had study
- speakergroups, as you say, if the churches
- speakerstarted that a couple of years
- speakerbefore then, clearly
- speakerthey were involved in this
- speakeras as well.
- speakerAnd so mine
- speakerwas probably let's
- speakersee if someone would be willing to
- speakercome and tell the story.
- speakerOh guess what, it's the minister
- speakerson. OK, and now
- speakerand again, that was fine.
- speakerAnd I never except
- speakerfor, as I'd say, a couple of folks,
- speakerI felt totally embraced by the
- speakerchurch, totally.
- speakerThese as I say, were friends.
- speakerThese were people whom I knew
- speakerand I liked so much.
- speakerAnd I think they were absolutely
- speakeropen. And what we learned is
- speakerwhatever they heard that particular
- speakerday was just
- speakerone more piece of information
- speakerfor them to assemble.
- speakerAnd also, you know, what families
- speakerthey came from and who knows
- speakerwho in that crowd I was speaking to
- speakeranyway, whose own
- speakerstory was
- speakerongoing.
- speakerSo but what was interesting, you
- speakerknow Dad became very
- speakermuch a supporter of
- speakerissues and the issue,
- speakerthis issue in the church and
- speakermy mother became involved
- speakerwith PFLAG right away.
- speakerI mean, it was kind of at the
- speakerbeginning of that.
- speakerAnd locally, she would say she would
- speakerget calls from parents who said,
- speakerwhat the hell is going on with my
- speakerkid? And so
- speakerMother would talk to them
- speakereven as she was trying to figure out
- speakerwhat's going on with my kid.
- speakerI
- speakerwasn't a kid, I was 30, 31,
- speakerbut in any case,
- speakerso yeah.
- speakerSo so
- speakeryou just mentioned your
- speakeryour father became kind of
- speakerwell you said he was obviously
- speakersupportive of you, but also
- speakersupportive of kind of
- speakergay liberation in the church, the
- speakerstruggle for ordination,
- speakerequality, the struggle for marriage
- speakerequality.
- speakerDid that come up?
- speakerI mean, I haven't read
- speakerthe records that you've given.
- speakerRight.
- speakerRight.
- speakerCan you describe ways that that
- speakermight have manifested in his
- speakerministry?
- speakerTo be perfectly honest, David, I
- speakercan't I
- speakerwould have to go back and look at
- speakersermons that he might that
- speakerhe was you know preaching
- speakerat the time in the 70s
- speakerand the 80s, up until 92.
- speakerWhen I send you a
- speakerbox, there's a whole
- speakerpacket of stuff that he has
- speakerlabeled homosexuality
- speakerso and so that
- speakermay contain some information,
- speakereither in terms of conferences
- speakeror studies
- speakerand.
- speakerAgain, sermons I'm not entirely
- speakersure, so,
- speakerI mean, that's something you know
- speakerwhat I could. Well, let's see.
- speakerI sent you a box.
- speakerMaybe 10 days ago,
- speakerwould you say, did you get
- speakersomething?
- speakerOh, yeah, absolutely. And that's
- speakerdescribed and online.
- speakerOK.
- speakerSo our description is up online.
- speakerOK,
- speakerso I guess I can't go to
- speakerthose particular sermons.
- speakerI'm thinking if I have a few
- speakermore sermons to
- speakerfrom the 80s, I think to send
- speakeryou.
- speakerThe first batch is 1943
- speakerto 1959.
- speakerRight.
- speakerKind of early stuff.
- speakerRight. That's right.
- speakerAnd then you'll get as
- speakerI think I indicated to the 60s,
- speakermy brother has the 60s
- speakersermons.
- speakerAs I said, not not to keep
- speakerbut just to he wanted to look
- speakerat them before he sent them
- speakeraway.
- speakerSo.
- speakerYeah okay,
- speakerwhen those arrive, I'm definitely on
- speakerthe lookout for, you know.
- speakerAbsolutely and
- speakerwhat you discover, let me know that
- speakerwould be you know that would be
- speakerinteresting.
- speakerI don't know, David.
- speakerDo you put these online
- speakeror do you just say we have these
- speakersermons, come to Philadelphia and
- speakerlook what.
- speakerI would say somewhere in between
- speakerthat. So our description
- speakergoes up online immediately.
- speakerSo there's just a text description
- speakerand that's designed to be
- speakerpublicly searchable and so that
- speakeranybody who stumbles across that
- speakercan say, I would like to
- speakerdigitize X or Y or Z.
- speakerOh, OK.
- speakerSo we're.
- speakerIn ordinary times, we're open to
- speakerthe public five days a week.
- speakerYeah, under pandemic conditions
- speakerwe're not, the lion's
- speakershare of the work that we're doing
- speakeris remote responses
- speakerand digitization, really.
- speakerBut David so
- speakerin other words, all of these
- speakersermons you wouldn't bother to
- speakerdigitize until
- speakersomeone actually says, I would like
- speakerto see that. And is that
- speakerthe right idea, they're hardcopy?
- speakerEither. Either researchers
- speakeror really staff.
- speakerI mean, we very frequently
- speakerjust flag stuff
- speakerto just be digitized
- speakerfor for our purposes.
- speakerTo add to our digital collections.
- speakerAnd, you know,
- speakeryour father's sermons or
- speakerother writings regarding
- speakerthe Presbyterian, you know,
- speakernew consciousness
- speakersurrounding human sexuality.
- speakerI think it's it's a given that we're
- speakergoing to get into that.
- speakerYeah. Yeah, sure.
- speakerWell, that's interesting.
- speakerI kind of wondered I said to Mark,
- speakerI don't know if they have a place
- speakerfor all of this or then
- speakerdigitized, but it sounds like, as
- speakeryou said, maybe as on an
- speakerindividual basis or need to know
- speakerbasis, you might digitize something
- speakereven as new archivists
- speakerwould say let me see what
- speakerkind of thread there might be in
- speakerterms of human
- speakersexuality in a
- speakerseries of sermons or what
- speakerwas happening in this person's
- speakersermons, in someone else's sermons?
- speakerI don't know, but.
- speakerYeah, a hundred percent.
- speakerYeah.
- speakerUnification, you're
- speakergoing to get a bunch of stuff.
- speakerYeah.
- speakerDo you have do you have Randy
- speakerTaylor's materials
- speakerby any chance?
- speakerI don't think we have personal
- speakerpapers from Randolph
- speakerTaylor.
- speakerBut you know something
- speakerabout your father's kind of
- speakercommitment to Presbyterian
- speakerreunion.
- speakerYeah, well, I just I know
- speakerand I found many photographs of Dad
- speakerand Randy and I
- speakerfound some wonderful programs
- speakerwhen in 83 things
- speakerI think were cinched,
- speakerif I'm not mistaken.
- speakerIs that right? Yeah.
- speakerAnd so you'll get those.
- speakerI'm packing those up.
- speakerBut they developed a very
- speakerwarm relationship back
- speakerand forth and
- speakermy father would go down to
- speakerMontreat where Randy and
- speakerhis wife lived and
- speakerknew the family and
- speakerthey must have come up to Albany
- speakeras well.
- speakerSo this this was a very personal
- speakerand warm friendship.
- speakerAnd clearly, they they
- speakerhad to do the hard work of
- speakerbringing protocols and
- speakerbelief systems and reconciling,
- speakerI'm sure, voices over
- speakertheir shoulders all the time saying
- speakerdo this or do that.
- speakerBut,
- speakeryeah, Dad always spoke very
- speakerwarmly about that partnership.
- speakerAnd so I know
- speakerhis name very
- speakerwell. But the particulars,
- speakernot so much. But I just know that it
- speakerwas a long friendship, was a long
- speakertime in coming, and
- speakerthey were glad.
- speakerYeah.
- speakerYou know, you mentioned
- speakeryour dad over the course of his work
- speakerkind of being
- speakeraway from the house or going to this
- speakermeeting, that meeting.
- speakerDid the family ever go
- speakerwith him to like like for General
- speakerAssembly, where you guys at the
- speakerGeneral Assembly where he was
- speakermoderator?
- speakerNo, I was
- speakerno, my mother.
- speakerLet's see, my
- speakermother must have traveled with him
- speakerduring that year when he was
- speakerout and about now, we were all
- speakergrown at the time.
- speakerSo we were off doing our own
- speakerour own things.
- speakerI was still in Boston and my sister
- speakerwas teaching and you know locally,
- speakeretc.
- speakerSo Mother Mother did
- speakergo with him yeah on on trips
- speakerand was part of it
- speakerbecause except for my
- speakerbrother Jim,
- speakerwho was 19 at the time,
- speakerhe too was off in college.
- speakerSo the point is that, yes,
- speakerthey did some of that.
- speakerWe didn't do that.
- speakerYeah, I suppose I was
- speakerchecking because I had this
- speakerimagination that so the 1974
- speakerGeneral Assembly is
- speakerremarkable to us and to other people
- speakerclose to us because
- speakerit is at that
- speakerassembly that a
- speakerdude named David Sindt,
- speakerwho was a candidate for a ministry
- speakerin Chicago.
- speakerHeld up a sign?
- speakerHeld up the sign, is anybody else out
- speakerthere gay?
- speakerYes, you mentioned that.
- speakerAnd when I saw that I thought,
- speakerGod, who you know,
- speakerI'd love to know that particular
- speakerepisode.
- speakerIn other words, did what happened
- speakerto this, David?
- speakerYeah, well, we
- speakerhave there's an oral history that
- speakerone of our other archivists Liz Wittrig did
- speakerwith a fellow named Barry
- speakerSmith, whose close to
- speakerDavid from his church, I believe.
- speakerAnd we have
- speakeran open real audio tape of
- speakerDavid preaching,
- speakerwhich I think is 69
- speakeror 70, 1969 or 1970,
- speakerand to be honest, I only know
- speakerpersonally I only know that one
- speakervignette.
- speakerI do know that
- speakerhe was not
- speakerultimately ordained.
- speakerThere were a number of other
- speakercandidates in Chicago who were
- speakeropenly gay
- speakerand who were not
- speakerordained. And that was kind of like
- speakera hotbed
- speakerof Presbyterians
- speakerattempts to just
- speakerrun somebody through the process
- speakerto challenge the system.
- speakerIt's like the same
- speakerway as
- speakerwhen
- speakerit's like a
- speakertest of the system,
- speakerbecause there's going to be judicial
- speakerprocesses that follow
- speakerthat you have to attempt to do a
- speakerthing before it gets litigated
- speakerand you try
- speakerpolity.
- speakerRight.
- speakerAnd this denomination,
- speakerit took until 2012
- speakerto for this denomination
- speakerto authorize
- speakerordination of
- speakergays and lesbians.
- speaker2012?
- speaker2012.
- speakerAnd it was 2014
- speakerbefore polity
- speakerchanged to
- speakerpermit gay marriage.
- speakerYeah.
- speakerSo it's a.
- speakerLong time.
- speakerIt's a very long struggle for
- speakerPresbyterians like kind of growing
- speakerup under those conditions,
- speakerespecially.
- speakerYeah. Yeah.
- speakerAnd you know that's an interesting
- speakerthing.
- speakerPresbyterians growing up under
- speakerthose conditions.
- speakerThat's an interesting and
- speakercorrect way to put it, because
- speakerclearly I saw
- speakeras I was in early
- speakerinvolvement with gay rights
- speakerissues, you know, groups like
- speakerIntegrity and
- speakerDignity.
- speakerAnd these were and I
- speakerremember feeling
- speakerI was not dismissive,
- speakerbut sometimes I really
- speakerwanted to say to folks, why are you
- speakertrying to reconcile these
- speakerantiquated institutions with
- speakerwho you are?
- speakerAnd and so I suppose I
- speakercould have even said it about you
- speakerknow Presbyterianism, anybody.
- speakerBut there were people who sincerely
- speakerwanted both.
- speakerThey wanted the life of
- speakerthe church and they wanted
- speakerthe life of that they were
- speakerliving.
- speakerAnd so this was really
- speakeryou know something to marvel at
- speakerpeople who really put themselves
- speakerout there to join both, right?
- speakerAnd as opposed
- speakerto me at that point kind of lapsed.
- speakerI was just feeling,
- speakeroh, the hell with them.
- speakerWho cares?
- speakerYeah, that's their problem.
- speakerThat's their problem. But that disrespects
- speakerpeople of faith who said,
- speakerno, this is we want to reconcile
- speakerand we want to be a place that
- speakerpeople come to and
- speakerall people come to.
- speakerSo, you know, in retrospect,
- speakerI admire the people who
- speakerstayed with it to make the
- speakerinstitution change.
- speakerThat's that would be a
- speakerbeautiful place to kind of
- speakerconclude.
- speakerOK.
- speakerBut I have one more thing to add,
- speakerand one of the things that I was
- speakerable to find in your
- speakerdad's papers that I did
- speakerkind of bring to light immediately
- speakerbecause we don't do every job, we
- speakerjot and tittle, right?
- speakerWe kind of
- speakerdo a broad description.
- speakerYou're too young to use the term jot
- speakerand tittle.
- speakerBut
- speakeryou said this is what
- speakerhe called junior sermons.
- speakerSo sermons designed for
- speakerthe Sunday school class or like
- speakeryouth in the church.
- speakerAnd there is there's one
- speakerthat is about
- speakerappreciating yourself as you are,
- speakerwhich is called the Saggy
- speakerBaggy Elephant.
- speakerAnd I don't know if you know that
- speakerbook.
- speakerYes.
- speakerYes. I can almost picture
- speakerthe pictures in it.
- speakerYes.
- speakerYeah, I, I was attracted
- speakerto that because I have to.
- speakerMy son is eight and we
- speakerread Saggy Baggy Elephant from when
- speakerhe was two years old.
- speakerAnd so to see that kind of like
- speakerin its original context of the
- speaker50s.
- speakerRight.
- speakerYou he's he's creating
- speakera sermon that is about.
- speakerYou know, of mutual
- speakerlove and respect and,
- speakerthe dignity of every
- speakerindividual, no
- speakermatter whether their skin has
- speakerlike large folds and wrinkles.
- speakerAbsolutely. Now, David, I have to
- speakerask, was that a kind of
- speakerserendipitous pulling out
- speakerof the pile to say,
- speakeryou know, just let me see what was
- speakergoing on?
- speakerI just flipped really quickly
- speakerand said, wow.
- speakerOK.
- speakerThat was the one that kind of came
- speakerto light.
- speakerSure, sure.
- speakerYeah, yeah.
- speakerWell,
- speakerwell, thank you, I,
- speakerI thank you on behalf of my family
- speakerand Dad and I wrote
- speakeryou very early on saying, I know
- speakerthat these were occasional pieces,
- speakerbut it's nice to know, too, that
- speakerthey may be of interest,
- speakerto someone down the road.
- speakerAnd they.
- speakerThey absolutely are they're going to
- speakerbe a, a really
- speakerlike a massive support
- speakerto the other kinds of materials
- speakerfrom other Presbyterian moderators.
- speakerGreat.
- speakerKind of fill in the continuum
- speakerof records of the church.
- speakerYeah.
- speakerSo we thank you for
- speakersending them to us.
- speakerAnd I'm really looking forward
- speakerto the next couple of tranches
- speakerof sermons.
- speakerYes, you'll you'll get them
- speakeras I construct
- speakerthe boxes and fill them.
- speakerSo.
- speakerThank you so much.
- speakerIt's so nice to meet you, David.
- speakerOh it's been a pleasure.
- speakerOK, take care.
- speakerWe'll be in touch.
- speakerOK, bye bye.